Easter Sunday

easter sunday...

i dont really know what to say... ive never really been a true christian. but here are a series of events that lead to one of the greatest moments in my life...

1)papa got sick last night and went to bed early. a regular thing but still quite difficult not to break into tears and yell at him for getting old... i love my papa so much that it made me angry that he was using his years up.
2)in the morning (this morning) papa told us that he wasnt going to go to church with us because he was afraid that he was going to get sick again. so he decided to sit at home and read the bible and learn how chocolate was made and how they got eggs from the chickens.
3)papa gave me $10 to give to the church; to put in the dropbox.

4)when we got to church there were so many people... but one stood out the most. she had short brown hair and was wearing a long blue dress that had hawaiian looking flowers down to the floor. she was one of the singers. so when she was singing... she would throw her head back and Worship. she wasnt one of the other girls that seemed to want to just look pretty and sound pretty... she didnt do a solo... she was just there. the most glorious girl in the world. and she was worshiping God and proclaiming it to the world.

5)i read what was up on the big screen....

 ¹ Early on the first day of the week, while it was still dark, Mary Magdalene went to the tomb and saw that the stone had been removed from the entrance. ² So she came running to Simon Peter and the other disciple, the one Jesus loved, and said, “They have taken the Lord out of the tomb, and we don’t know where they have put him!”³ So Peter and the other disciple started for the tomb. ⁴ Both were running, but the other disciple outran Peter and reached the tomb first. ⁵ He bent over and looked in at the strips of linen lying there but did not go in. ⁶ Then Simon Peter came along behind him and went straight into the tomb. He saw the strips of linen lying there, ⁷ as well as the cloth that had been wrapped around Jesus’ head. The cloth was still lying in its place, separate from the linen. ⁸ Finally the other disciple, who had reached the tomb first, also went inside. He saw and believed. (John 20:1-8)

 the last word was my favorite... shivers down my back. goose bumps on my arms... and even now as i type this... butterflies in my stomach.

At the end of the service, the preacher asked if, during the next song, that if anyone would like to come stand in the front. to pray with him and receive God and be absolved of any and all sins. i sat there and listened to the music. i prayed for papa as best as i could like he asked me to. and i prayed for an answer, a sign as to whether i should stay seated and just believe that i believe... or go up to the front. not 30 seconds later i started crying. tears rolling down my  cheeks like the crocodiles themselves. i hid my face in Spencers arm... but after a couple seconds i realized... that i wasnt crying for papa. i wasnt crying because i was upset about something... i was crying because i was afraid i would miss the chance to stand up in front of everybody and claim my love for Him. i stood up and grabbed Spencers had and took him up to the huge alter where 20+ people had gathered. the preacher threw up his arms and prayed for all of us. i wasnt listening to the words of the prayer though... i was listening to God. i was hearing all that he wanted from me... from us. and i was with the one i love and the family that i loved. i swore to myself and to Him that i would try so much harder to talk to him more often and to be a better person. the time i was up there in my boyfriends arms... it was so powerful! one of the most amazing moments in my life... accepting God into my heart and soul.