and this is where the nightmare comes in...

my great grandfather is my favorite person in the world... in fact, i had a dream the other night,

     i was standing there alone, and slowly things started to make sense to me... i was at my papas. everything was covered in all different colors of roses... it was beautiful, the most perfect thing ive ever seen. there were rows of seats... white lawn chairs. and i started noticing people i love in those chairs. mom and dad, gail and her kids. my brother and sister were standing in the front, looking all grown up. Ashley had on a beautiful cream colored dress, with groups of roses strategically places in her upper right torso to her left ankle. it was beautiful. Michael was on the other side of the aisle--and as i thought this i noticed that there really was an isle--with a cream colored tux on, but no jacket. he had one red rose over his heart. (i believe that means that your mother is alive, does it not? cause if it doesnt... something was a little wrong... white means shes dead so i think red is a good sign?) there were 2 men standing on either side of me, my great grandfather and my dad. the 2 most important men in my life. it felt right to me, like this was how it was supposed to be. then the music started; the wedding march by Mendelssohn... it was beautiful.

and now heres the nightmare part,
my great grandfather has been thinking about who will get his property when he dies... i hear rumers that if it goes to this person... they are going to sell it. and if it goes to this person, we wont be aloud there. every since i was a little girl ive dreamed of getting married on that property with both my favored men beside me (the aisle will have to be extra big hehe).

in my dream that night, it was like breaking a mirror, and as i took the first step toward my new life with this masked man at the alter... it all broke and i fell...

(p.s. please dont ask who the man at the alter was cause i honestly didnt see his face. that goes to you to aunt lisa!)

weekend before christmas

we went to my nanas house this weekend... to see the Living Nativity... it was great... but that one wasnt my favorite.

the night we got to nanas she had fresh cookies in the oven. the smell of nanas house always makes me feel at home... but when there are fresh cookies... MMM!!!!! makes me love it even more!!

there was a 3 phase plan we had to fallow;
1) open the presents. they were all in square boxes, the same size.
2)play a game while our presents charged. we had all gotten a remote control helicopter.
3) all the helicopters in the air and nana would bring in a bottle of wine with 2 crystal glasses to say congratz to my dad and gail for getting married

by the way, gail and dad got married.

at the nativity, half of the play was inside, they always have brought horses and donkeys through on the stage and its always just so cool. when we went outside for the second half of the play, clayton (my second oldest cousin) had hugged the wrong man thinking he was his dad. it was so cute. but he started crying and it got sad... but he found his daddy:) (and dont worry clayton, i did the same thing once or twice)

on the way back, dad dropped me off at spencers house<3. it was about midnight when i got there. i just snuck in and spencer had lain with me until i fell alseep. i love falling asleep with him there, makes me feel protected... like when i used to sleep in my parents bed...

spencer helped with his aunts play the next day. it was a little nativity all their own... so cute!

then later that night, we had gone to his church for a play. that was really good... and i think it touched me a little more then the others, it was more heartfelt, and really cute:)

dad hadnt answered his phone at all and i didnt want to make Pilar (spencers mother) drive me in if my dad was going to pick me up. but it was about 9:30pm before he finally replied and i got to stay another night:) but when he tried to put me to sleep again... he fell asleep all his own... and Pilar came in at 4am and found him. for the record, i dont remember any of this and spencer keeps saying that there was a lot of yelling... personally i think that he jsut fell asleep with me for a while then went out onto the couch all his own.

that morning i had to go home... but spencer cane with me:) but he fell asleep on the couch and started snoring... it was funny:)

when i was doing the stuff i just wrote about, i had planned out a few more things and i wish i had gotten to a computer before this. but i didnt and this is the best i could do. thank you of reading along!

sleeping together

spencer stayed the night at my house the other day.... first night he actually stayed. and when i was saying goodnight to him... my dad came in and spoke to him...

"you know, Gail had a good point... she said that i should stress the fact that i had a loaded gun under my bed..." then there was a pause and i swear there was fear from spencers eyes to his toes... it. was. priceless!!!! so great! of course when i was saying goodnight to my dad... smacked him over the head *smiley face* but of course, gail didnt actually say that.


though i think spencer still believes him...
                                                                   and i wouldnt put it past my dad either